So, it's been 5 months since I last updated my site and since then I got married, had a couple of kids and switched career paths. Well, the "got married" part is true, but the others are still in the making! :)

So, it's been 5 months since I last updated my site and since then I got married, had a couple of kids and switched career paths. Well, the "got married" part is true, but the others are still in the making! :)

Seriously though, being married is the most amazing blessing God has ever given me and I truly believe that David would agree with me. It is hard to put the emotions I have experienced throughout the past two and a half months into words, but if the feeling of being intimate with God is even greater than the feeling of being intimate with your spouse, then I am sad to say that I have not truly experienced an intimate relationship with God. However, I now realize that there are things in my life that need to change in order for me to be a true daughter of Christ and I am excited about pursuing them!  

I have so much more to say about marriage….which some of you probably don’t care to hear because you are single and don’t want another happy married woman telling you how great it is to be loved…..but I really do want to tell you a little bit more about the blessings of being married as they relate to the blessings of being single next time I have time to write. (Hopefully that won’t be five months from now!!!)

God is good…..don’t ever forget that! As much as you hate hearing “everything happens in HIS own time,” it’s true. He will never leave you, He will never forsake and He will always give you the desires of your heart if those desires are based off of His will for your life. Wanting a mate is a legitimate desire…..I truly believe that and I am praying for those of you who are currently seeking a Godly companion!!

I am sitting in Julie's closet again.....typing as she tries on different outfits for our friend Anyssa's wedding this weekend. I wish I looked as cute as does.....for real.....she is beautiful. And.....now the self-pity party is over.

The lingerie shower went really good tonight. Those quiet girls at church that no one ever hears a peep from can be really funny when given the opportunity! I will not mention any names....but should the girl who got Becky the "tassels" wear find herself reading this entry.....I bow down to you! That was classic...especially for you! I love you girl!

OK, my head is pounding and I took some Tylenol PM a little bit ago....it is now kicking in. So have a lovely evening and a wonderful Friday.

Seriously, I don’t think it could be possible for time to move any slower today. I am having one of those extremely busy and crazy days at work……but I feel like every time I look at the clock on my computer it says the same thing!!! It is now 5:04….let’s see what time it is when I am done typing this entry.  My goal is to end my day by doing nothing…..I am tired of working today. Is that bad??

I am going to a friend’s lingerie shower tonight and I am both excited and nervous all at the same time. I am excited because being at her shower will make it a reality that my lingerie shower will be here before I know it and that makes me nervous because that means MY LINGERIE SHOWER WILL BE HERE BEFORE I KNOW IT which in return means my wedding will be fifteen days later!  How exciting and nerve-racking. I am so ready though. Not ready as in like all the planning is done….crap, I have barely finalized anything!!! But I am so ready to just be married and come home every night to the man I love with all of my heart.

If for nothing else this fast has made me realize just how much I need David in my life. I wanted to see if I could go one week without thinking about him every waking moment but one thing I realized this week is that God didn’t allow me to give my heart to somebody He trusted and hand-picked to be my husband because He wanted me to see how painful it would be to force myself to not think about him! He introduced me to David….who introduced me to the true meaning of love and for that I am eternally grateful.

 I like telling ya’ll about some of the answers I have received this week…..it is fun to let you know that God is proving Himself faithful which I totally knew He would!!

OK, so it is now 5:05…kidding….I am not that fast of a typer!  It’s actually about that time so I should go for now. Have a wonderful and blessed evening!

It has been a really long time since I last wrote....or even had the time to write for that matter. It feels really good to sit in Julie's tiny closet and type with my legs cramping up from sitting in this awkward position......

After much thought and a whole lot of frustration, I decided that from Monday to Friday of this week I would take a break from the daily activities (except for work) that have become my life and shaped who I have become, in order to allow myself to refocus on the one thing that should truly matter to me because it is the source of my life.....my relationship with my Father.

I tried for a long time to convince myself that I actually had an intimate relationship with God. I talked to Him on a daily basis, I wrote in my journal whenever I got the chance and I even "advertised" Him to my co-workers when and if the opportunity arose at work. All of those things describe me and the woman I want to be, but it still kills me to admit that I was only trying to convince others, and maybe even myself, that I was where I needed to be in my walk with Him. Up until this point in my life my relationship with Him has been one of convenience.....for me. I now know just how selfish I have become.

Hence the decision to "fast" this week. I decided that in order for me to hear Him, I needed to force myself to be STILL and KNOW that He is and will always be God....my God. I told my friends, family members and even my precious fiance that I would be unavailable until Friday evening. Some took it much better than I expected, others weren't so encouraging at first, but they came around once they fully understood what I was trying to do.

I am now on day two....and no, it has definitely NOT been easy. Last night I bought a book that I would strongly suggest any and all women reading this site buy and read immediately. It is called "Beside Every Good Man...Learning to Love Myself While Standing By Him," and it is written by Serita Jakes (T.D. Jakes wife). I am only on chapter three, but I am convinced that when I asked God to show me what book He wanted me to read.....He answered me. I sat on the floor of a Half-Price Books store for hours last night reading various sections of books and nothing caught my attention until I stood up to leave and her book was on the end of the aisle. I picked it up and immediately knew it was the one. It is amazing and whether or not you believe me, it is God's way of speaking to me....maybe not to you, but definitely to me. 

I went into this week asking Him to speak to me on some very specific issues and in just three chapters He has answered two of my questions. I believe that He is calling each and every one of us by name. It was just my turn to answer Him....giving Him the time to work in me and through me for His glory and honor.

I will write more tomorrow....Julie is trying to sleep and I am typing in her closet!!!

May He sing over you tonight as you sleep. Goodnight.

P.S.

I know I am not supposed to....but I am just going to say a quick "I love you" and if one of God's adorable 6'5" creatures happens to be reading this....it would be safe to assume I was saying it to him......(K)